Sadly it is a message that either didn’t resonate with or get to 15 year old Jamie Hubley.
He is a young boy who ended his life earlier this month thanks to what he felt was unbearable pressure of being bullied by his peers.
This week, Rick Mercer dedicated some more time to this tragic story and the never-ending problem that caused it.
I have had a difficult time writing this entry, mostly because my eyes keep welling up with tears of sadness that this happens to anyone. That, and because I have to carefully select my words and avoid using vulgarities that are spawned by the pure RAGE I feel when I think of the people who drove this and every teenager that has ended his life to such a drastic and final decision. So I will ask that you bear with me as I continue.
When is our society going to say enough is enough and start bringing these bullies to justice? When are we going teach our children that it is not cool to taunt or tease another child because they are different? And I am not just talking about the youth who attack other children because they are homophobic. I am talking about ALL forms of bullying; for any reason.
Being in a newsroom myself and knowing a number of people in social services that are implementing programs to help deal with bullying, it is good to see that at least something is being done. (I guess I just answered my own questions from the previous paragraph. Like I said... you are going to have to bear with me here) I appreciate the efforts made by these adults who are recognizing the issues and trying to help our youth deal with them by shining a light on the problem.
Jamie Hubley’s parents should be commended for coming out to tell the world about their son and the troubles he lived through. Think about it; it was a double whammy for them. Not only was their son gay, a fact that STILL in this day in age, forces so many people to hide who they really are out of fear of reprisal from homophobes everywhere, their son also committed suicide, a topic that has always come with a stigma of shame for the people left behind. I remember growing up and being silenced by adults when the topic of suicide came up, because "that is not polite conversation".
Their courage in speaking out will not bring their son back, but maybe it will get other families talking about their feelings and issues that are festering and growing while they stay silent. If it saves even ONE life...then perhaps they will be able to take some solace in that.
There is going to come a time though, when talking about it won’t be enough. In fact, when it comes to dealing with bullies, the time for talk has long since passed. It is time for action...RIGHT NOW!
It is time for those kids who are being harassed and tortured to stop quietly grinning and bearing it. It is time to stand up and say “I am being bullied and it has to stop”. It’s time for the kids who sit idly by and watch it happen out of fear that they might be the next target, to have the courage to say “Knock it off!” I am not talking about “taking the law into your own hands” or turning the tables and bullying the bullies. I am talking about all of you standing side by side with the victims of this torture and force it to stop with a little solidarity, and let’s face it; you outnumber those bullies at LEAST 50 to 1. And how about reporting this crap to the teachers or parents who can help put a stop to this. And by the way, it is time to stop worrying about being called a rat. If you see something that isn’t right, tell someone about it.
Is it easy? Nope. I won’t lie to you; it takes a courage that a lot of people never have the ability to find. But look yourself in the mirror and ask yourself. If you were the target of a bully, would you not appreciate any and all of the help you could get to bring a stop to it? WHEN you answer yes, you will know what you have to do.
And for the schools and teachers...how about getting the police involved here, huh? How about sticking these punks with harassment charges? It’s like Mercer said, they would bring the cops in to get to the bottom of who vandalised the cafeteria or the outer school wall with graffiti...are we saying that our kids are less important than property?
All you bleeding hearts who think laying harassment charges are too serious a punishment to get the law involved? All of you who think it’s not fair to saddle the perpetrators with a record for the rest of their lives? Would you be willing to live with the consequences of your child’s decision to end his/her life because bullies are making it unbearable and are getting away with it?
Criminal behavior must have consequences, and bullying IS criminal behaviour. Time to call this what it is.
I try to teach my daughter to be respectful of people until they show you they don’t deserve respect. I try to teach her that we all have our foibles that make us different (and living with me she gets a firsthand example of that) and that is not the reason to taunt or tease someone. It is reason to celebrate, because frankly if we were all the same...this world would be a pretty boring place. I try to teach her to be a leader through her words and actions. No this doesn’t make me a hero...these are just conversations that have to happen with our children if there is any hope to end to this abhorrent behaviour. Further, they are conversations that have to KEEP happening until they stick.
In closing... I wish to give my condolences to the Hubley family, and indeed every family who is left behind after a teen suicide. For the kids who are being bullied...Rick Mercer is right... it DOES get better... but hopefully the rest of us can help you out with that and find a way to make it stop.
I know I will try to do my part.
No comments:
Post a Comment