ENOUGH ALREADY!

Almost three years ago CBC’s Rick Mercer offered up one of his classic rants that appear on “This Hour has 22 Minutes” on the topic of living through being bullied.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t1Y7qpiu2RQ&NR=1

Sadly it is a message that either didn’t resonate with or get to 15 year old Jamie Hubley.

He is a young boy who ended his life earlier this month thanks to what he felt was unbearable pressure of being bullied by his peers.

This week, Rick Mercer dedicated some more time to this tragic story and the never-ending problem that caused it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wh1jNAZHKIw&feature=youtu.be

I have had a difficult time writing this entry, mostly because my eyes keep welling up with tears of sadness that this happens to anyone.  That, and because I have to carefully select my words and avoid using vulgarities that are spawned by the pure RAGE I feel when I think of the people who drove this and every teenager that has ended his life to such a drastic and final decision.  So I will ask that you bear with me as I continue.

When is our society going to say enough is enough and start bringing these bullies to justice?  When are we going teach our children that it is not cool to taunt or tease another child because they are different?  And I am not just talking about the youth who attack other children because they are homophobic.  I am talking about ALL forms of bullying; for any reason.

Being in a newsroom myself and knowing a number of people in social services that are implementing programs to help deal with bullying, it is good to see that at least something is being done. (I guess I just answered my own questions from the previous paragraph.  Like I said... you are going to have to bear with me here) I appreciate the efforts made by these adults who are recognizing the issues and trying to help our youth deal with them by shining a light on the problem.

Jamie Hubley’s parents should be commended for coming out to tell the world about their son and the troubles he lived through.  Think about it; it was a double whammy for them.  Not only was their son gay, a fact that STILL in this day in age, forces so many people to hide who they really are out of fear of reprisal from homophobes everywhere, their son also committed suicide, a topic that has always come with a stigma of shame for the people left behind. I remember growing up and being silenced by adults when the topic of suicide came up, because "that is not polite conversation". 

Their courage in speaking out will not bring their son back, but maybe it will get other families talking about their feelings and issues that are festering and growing while they stay silent.  If it saves even ONE life...then perhaps they will be able to take some solace in that.

There is going to come a time though, when talking about it won’t be enough.  In fact, when it comes to dealing with bullies, the time for talk has long since passed. It is time for action...RIGHT NOW!

It is time for those kids who are being harassed and tortured to stop quietly grinning and bearing it.  It is time to stand up and say “I am being bullied and it has to stop”. It’s time for the kids who sit idly by and watch it happen out of fear that they might be the next target, to have the courage to say “Knock it off!”  I am not talking about “taking the law into your own hands” or turning the tables and bullying the bullies.  I am talking about all of you standing side by side with the victims of this torture and force it to stop with a little solidarity, and let’s face it; you outnumber those bullies at LEAST 50 to 1.  And how about reporting this crap to the teachers or parents who can help put a stop to this.  And by the way, it is time to stop worrying about being called a rat.  If you see something that isn’t right, tell someone about it. 

Is it easy?  Nope.  I won’t lie to you; it takes a courage that a lot of people never have the ability to find.  But look yourself in the mirror and ask yourself.  If you were the target of a bully, would you not appreciate any and all of the help you could get to bring a stop to it?  WHEN you answer yes, you will know what you have to do.

And for the schools and teachers...how about getting the police involved here, huh?  How about sticking these punks with harassment charges?  It’s like Mercer said, they would bring the cops in to get to the bottom of who vandalised the cafeteria or the outer school wall with graffiti...are we saying that our kids are less important than property?

All you bleeding hearts who think laying harassment charges are too serious a punishment to get the law involved?  All of you who think it’s not fair to saddle the perpetrators with a record for the rest of their lives?  Would you be willing to live with the consequences of your child’s decision to end his/her life because bullies are making it unbearable and are getting away with it?

Criminal behavior must have consequences, and bullying IS criminal behaviour.  Time to call this what it is.

I try to teach my daughter to be respectful of people until they show you they don’t deserve respect.  I try to teach her that we all have our foibles that make us different (and living with me she gets a firsthand example of that) and that is not the reason to taunt or tease someone.  It is reason to celebrate, because frankly if we were all the same...this world would be a pretty boring place.  I try to teach her to be a leader through her words and actions.  No this doesn’t make me a hero...these are just conversations that have to happen with our children if there is any hope to  end to this abhorrent behaviour. Further, they are conversations that have to KEEP happening until they stick.

In closing... I wish to give my condolences to the Hubley family, and indeed every family who is left behind after a teen suicide.  For the kids who are being bullied...Rick Mercer is right... it DOES get better... but hopefully the rest of us can help you out with that and find a way to make it stop. 

I know I will try to do my part.

Over the Razors Edge

I have blogged on exploitation before and while I was annoyed with it in the past, what I saw today disgusted and disheartened me.

I am about to proudly admit something that my partner will wish I had kept to myself.

She doesn’t understand it and probably finds it embarrassing that she is in love with a guy who enjoys it as much as I do.

I like Professional Wrestling.

I watched this much maligned form of entertainment from a very young age, (probably younger than I should have looking back at it now), alongside my father who would catch it on Saturdays when he was home.  Every Saturday afternoon we would tune in to Stampede Wrestling from Calgary, best known as the home of the Hart Brothers, Brett and Owen (RIP). 

We cheered the “Faces” (Good guys) hated the “Heels” (bad guys) and enjoyed the battles that would play out over the 8 to 10 minute matches.  I was amazed at their strength, the great shape the wrestlers were in, the gimmicks. 

Then it moved onto watch World Wrestling Federation matches with dad, which was Stampede Wrestling on steroids (very apropos as it turns out).  Everything was bigger and better.  The wrestlers were larger; the managers were louder, the personalities wilder.  I bought the gimmicks hook line and sinker...totally lost in the storylines that were being told on a weekly basis.

It wasn’t until I got older when I started seeing the unseemly side of the wrestling world.  The stories about the men BEHIND the characters I would see every week became more interesting than the wrestling itself.  Thankfully this also coincided with many of the wrestlers becoming involved in writing their own books or the release of documentaries.

“Beyond the Mat” was perhaps the best of the documentaries, albeit slightly depressing, predominantly because of the story it shared on Jake “The Snake” Roberts. 

Easily one of my very favourite characters, mostly because he was the first of the “heels” I liked.  Dangerous and mysterious, at any second he could end a match with his patented finisher, the “DDT”, he would then take his massive snake “Damien” out of the army bag he would bring to ringside and drape it all over his felled opponent.  Even when he lost I thought he was unbeatable... unstoppable...larger than life.

 The documentary changed all of that.  What was shown was a man, decimated by addictions to drugs and alcohol, an estranged relationship with his daughter, desperately trying to hold on to a past that had long since left him behind.  The bright lights that shone on him no longer highlighting the character he was, but pointing out the shell of a man he had become.

I hadn’t watched that movie in years...but today I was given a look at the next, and certainly not the last, tragic story in the world of professional wrestling, in the form of a special ESPN feature/documentary called: “The Wrestler:The Scott Hall Story”.

http://espn.go.com/video/clip?id=7124904

Just like in “Beyond The Mat”, this video features a wrestling legend who has fallen victim to the success he enjoyed in his glory days, where alcohol, drugs, sex were abundant, and cares were few and far between. 

It goes deep into the story about his youth, highlights of an unseemly past, his entry into the profession the rise to the top of the mountain and the painful and heartbreaking fall that cost him more than it should cost anyone.

His choice to continue as a professional wrestler, barely a shell of his former self at the age of 53 is not the exploitation that has me so angry.  He is making this choice for himself and even though everyone, himself included, knows he should stop...he continues on.  It is a free world and it is his right to live it as he wishes.

It is not the fact that this video was produced that bothers me either.  It is these types of videos that humanize the individuals that we make out to be heroes all too often.  We need to see that even those individuals that we think “have it all”, have their own issues that they need to deal with.  Pitfalls that if left unchecked, could destroy even the most grounded individual.   Seeing the tears in his eyes...seeing the pain in the eyes of his son...it was enough to bring tears to my eyes as well. As a father myself, it bothers me a great deal to see how he chose the life on the road and the drugs over his family.  I pity him and what his life has become and what he has had to live through, but I have also lost a lot of respect for him.

It’s not even the fact that his own son who has had a ringside seat to watch his father’s life being destroyed that bothers me, or the fact that Scott Hall is pushing his son and encouraging him to get involved in the profession. 

No... My anger is directed squarely at the wrestling promoter who took advantage of Scott Hall at his lowest point. 

A man who sees an intoxicated, drugged up, shell of a wrestler that was supposed to be his star performer of the night and instead of doing the moral and HUMAN thing by telling the crowd that had gathered that Hall was not fit to perform, decides to disregard the wrestlers his health and dignity and send him out through the curtain so that he wouldn’t have to give refunds.

This scummy promoter and miserable excuse of a human being claims that he was “showing the world who Scott Hall was”, like he was doing the world a favour.  He claimed it was a business decision for his promotion.  But even that is a joke, as I can come up with at least two other solutions to the problem.

A)     Flat out tell the crowd that Scott Hall is unable to perform during the show that night and deal with the fallout.  As Hall was later diagnosed as being under the influence of drugs, the promoter surely would have been able to sue for failure to perform and get back every dollar he lost in gate fee refunds.

B)      Have him show up on the evening, not as a performer, but as a former star who could sign autographs for the fans who wanted to see him.  Set up a table and let the fans visit with him and get something signed and be on their way. 

Neither one of these suggestions is ideal.  Hell, they flat out suck for the fans.  I know I would be disappointed to not be able to watch one of my favourites (although for my money I would much rather have the older stars that I love taking part in option B as a rule when they are brought into independent promotions.  Leave the wrestling to the younger guys...but I digress).  But if the option is to not see one of the stars of years past, or witnessing the humiliation that Scott Hall lived through (by his own hands)...there’s no question I’d rather not see him at all.

Both of those suggestions, though not ideal, are smarter business decisions because:

A)     You don’t put yourself at the risk of being sued by the Hall family should he die while performing in the ring when CLEARLY he was in no shape to be involved in physical activity of ANY nature, never mind wrestling.  He very easily could have died right there in the ring...I can only hope that isn’t what the promoter was wishing for, since clearly it would have thrust his little operation into the limelight...a clearly evil thought indeed.

B)      You don’t embarrass your promotion by putting out substandard entertainment for the dollars the fans pay.  Tell me wrestling fan, would you EVER spend another dollar with a company that thought it was ok to make you watch that embarrassing display?  I damn near didn’t make it through the 30 seconds of highlights in this documentary, never mind the whole damn match.

But I don’t care about the business aspect of this.   What bothers me is that this jerk couldn’t be bothered to do the human and moral thing and keep Hall from performing.

He chose the dollar over the human being. 

I discovered over time that wrestling's dark side is filled with exploitation and horrible stories that are almost enough to sour me on watching ever again.  The event on April 8th, 2011 displayed in "The Wrestler" was the pinnacle of exploitation and shows just how selfish a man can be.

Sadly, Scott Halls behaviour shows that too.

You talkin' to me?

I’ve learned something very valuable this weekend...something I have suspected for a while, but didn’t have fully confirmed until today.

Many people, like me, have the chance to speak their minds on any topic they like in mediums like blogs or social networking sites, Twitter, etc.  The fact that they feel compelled enough to share their thoughts and feelings with the world in these mediums tells me that they believe in their stances quite passionately.  I mean, it’s one thing to be a Carolina Hurricane fan, it’s another to put yourself out there and tell then world that you love this team and you don’t care who knows.

With all of these opinions flying about unregulated and free to be read by whoever can access them, there is much to be learned.  I have loved the ability to see people’s opinions on the vanilla and spicy topics alike.  It has allowed me to come to a better understanding of the people around me, whether I agreed with them or not.

There is one thing I feel compelled to say though, consider this a public service announcement.  Should you come across an opinion that you don’t agree with in the form of a twitter hit or a Facebook status update...

DO NOT... I REPEAT...DO NOT... speak against it in any way, shape or form.

No one is interested in hearing an opposing opinion.  No one cares to know that they are disagreed with somehow.   No one wants to hear facts or statistics that may be contrary to the opinion that they have presented.

 It happened to me on no less than three occasions on two different mediums before I finally got it through my thick skull. Of course this experience drove me to blog on this myself which some will surely find to be ironic and perhaps even hypocritical.

Is there no one who is interested in being involved in reasonable and passionate discussion anymore?

This is a very big problem in the world today.  Many aren’t willing to hear a differing opinion about anything or will blow you off dismissively because they don’t appreciate the opposing view.  They want to be “re-tweeted” and “liked” as many times as possible.  End of story.

As someone who has developed a knack for putting myself out there and saying what I think, I EXPECT people to take issue.  I HOPE others will speak out if they think I am full of shit and explain exactly why they think so.  I WANT to debate.

Argue with me.  Point out the flaws in my thought process.  Label the errors in judgement I make. Maybe we can come to a better understanding of each other. I have learned a great deal from people that I have disagreed vehemently with, and I don't think I am out of turn by saying that my opponent came out learning a great deal as well.

Just don’t dismiss what I am saying.  It cheapens your argument and it’s annoying.... more annoying than you not agreeing with my by a wide margin.

It doesn’t mean we will end up agreeing.  In fact, just to be sure we are clear on this... you are still wrong.

Just sayin’.

"Because knowing is half the battle" OR "Some massages are more urgent than others"

Something silly for you this evening.

As a kid I enjoyed watching the GI JOE cartoons (much to the chagrin of my sisters and my Mom who had to break up the continual fighting over the situation) and would try not to miss a single episode (no matter how brutal they got after they added Serpentor...but I digress)

I happened across an episode on Teletoon Retro tonight and began to laugh out loud like a lunatic.

It's a tiny clip, and I KNOW I didn't notice it the first time I saw this episode decades ago.  You will find it within the following segment.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SYY5Z8C1T-w

Did you catch it?

At 2:26 on the computer monitor... "URGENT SOS MASSAGE"

Then, just 8 seconds later... "END OF MASSAGE"

Now... I may not know many things; I have never been accused of being the brightest bulb in the chandelier. I DO know this...

ANY massage that is listed as "URGENT" or requiring an S.O.S had better last a whole lot longer than 8 bloody seconds.  (You can thank me for that little tidbit of advice later, fellas.)

We now return you to your regularly scheduled mid 80's US military promotional cartoon...

A Little Less Talk and A Lot More...Accountability

Ok... so the joy of being lucky enough to live in the society that we do is that we all have a right to speak our minds.

And with so many veins of information available to us through radio, television (all 500 channels of it) and possibly the least controllable of all, the internet, it’s easy to see and hear a lot of those minds spoken.

For the most part those voices simply become “white noise” that just fades into the background, unless something truly out of the ordinary or controversial is said.

Cue Hank Williams Jr.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1eF6vCv13bw

Now for those of you who may not be aware of who he is, Hank Williams Jr. is a country music icon and the singer of the Monday Night Football anthem (of which he simply adapted from his song “All My Rowdy Friends”).  And as you can see he is...opinionated.

Comparing Barack Obama to Hitler is quite possibly the stupidest thing that has ever been said... and that says a lot, especially with the very well documented comments of Glen “Nazi Tourettes” Beck still around.   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JngI1_8beoA

Of course, the outrage over the comments by Williams Jr. has him quickly suggesting that we have all misunderstood what he was trying to say. Obviously it is OUR fault that he directly compared Obama with Hitler, right Hank?

Then there is the fallout.  As is reported in this Reuters article ( http://www.reuters.com/article/2011/10/04/idUSN1E79228L20111004 ), ESPN dropped the song of which Hank is famous for these days as a reaction to his ridiculous statement.

Instantly, free speech champions and redneck, whiskey drinkin’, football lovin’ son of a guns everywhere start screaming at the Sports broadcasting giant that they are infringing on his rights to speak his mind and that the very first amendment gives him protection to do just that.

What these people forget, and ALWAYS seem to forget in these cases, is that while we most certainly have the right in a free society to speak our minds and say what we wish, it does NOT mean that we are immune to the consequences of what we choose to say.

Evelyn Beatrice Hall said “I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it”. And in this case it holds very true.  You Hank are most certainly allowed to compare Barack Obama to Adolf Hitler.  That is your right as a free man (and a redneck, whiskey drinkin’, football lovin’, son of a gun for that matter) and I most certainly defend it (perhaps not to my death...but that is more about me wanting to live than it is a lack of conviction in my belief).

However, it is MY right to punish you for those ridiculous comments by writing this blog to announce what an ignoramus you are, by refusing to listen to your music, by no longer ensuring that I am in front of my TV to see the opening of Monday Night Football, hell to stop drinkin’ whiskey myself if I so choose.

The bottom line is quite simple. Free speech is meaningless if you aren’t willing to be accountable for it too.

Of course after all of this there is still one pressing question that needs to be asked, but frankly I don’t think we will ever find the answer for...

What made Fox News think he was qualified to speak on the political climate facing the United States or rather... what made them think we CARE what he thinks, anyway?